Sunday, September 11, 2005

A time to remember and reflect

Today was made "Patriot Day" by act of Congress in 2001
It is a time for parades that make everyone feel good about emergency response when you call the number 911 and also is a time to have another holiday to show how kick ass America is for remembering its troops after we collectivly pissed on them for the governements fuck-ups in Vietnam. The origins of this holiday are shrouded in mystery. But you should not worry yourselves with any thoughts of proper memorials to fallen civillians or the heroic acts by firefighters or police, this is all about honoring the troops and the massive throbbing might of our military!

It is also about saluting our TRUE AMERICAN PATRIOTS!

I honor these two patriots as "THEKAMISAMA'S PATRIOTS OF THE DAY"

Bruce Campbell.
b-film actor/adventurer.
Honored for his upstanding defense of the homeland against evil demons, mummies, commies, and aliens!

adventurer/blogger/demon. (currently MIA)
Honored for his one man determination to defeat Hurricanes, the gothic media, Star Wars playa hata's , trolls, and B2K.

Friday, September 09, 2005

I was wondering at work today..

What happened to that a guy who yelled FUCK OFF to Dick Cheney?

I mean they implied on the news that he was dealt with in some form or fashion, but never made mention of him being arrested, slapped around, shot with a silenced weapon, or even slapped with an FCC fine.

Where do you put such an outlandish criminal who would dare mock the Vice President on live television?

Maybe they sent him to one of our top secret holding facilities for insurgents and criminal enemy combatants..
So he is either at GITMO learning some new conversational Arabic and learning to read from his new premoistened Koran...

either that or they sent him to the government's new holding facility on site at the Houston AstroDome....

Maybe the whole thing was staged? It seemed a little fake, didn't it?

The whole thing was reminicent of when Dicky-poo himself went and dropped some F-BOMBS on C-SPAN. He told Senator Pat Leahy to "go fuck yourself"
Two incidents like this and he still hasn't gotten one fucking FCC fine? They wanted to fine Bono for a half audible screamed out one at a goddamn awards show. Where is the Colin Powell's son handing out the pink illegal FUCK PARKING tickets this time?!!?!?
You know Dick will deny any involvement in knowing that it was going to happen or that the incident might have been staged.. but so did Janet Jackson, remember???

Dick does need to get new material however.. he drug out the "John Kerry" comeback, like it was fucking 2003 again or some shit! Your the vice president man.. shell out the money for your writers to throw you a few new smart ass quips that relate more to current events.

No wonder you guys thought Iraq still had the 20 year old mustard gas you sold them to kill off the Kurds!

On a side note, you guys notice that the IPODS are getting smaller while FURBYS seem to be getting bigger?!?!

Sunday, September 04, 2005

It would've been funny to see Mike Myer's head explodee live on teevee

Thursday, September 01, 2005


I am lazy so I will let speak for me a bit on the goings on at OZZFEST futher commentary by myself follows..

Well, now that we're back from OzzFest (rolled in around four a.m.). I've got a
slight burn on my cheeks and my arms are darker than they were before.

Let's see, we got there at 9:30, and if I could find the
little card, I'd give you a set list. I know that Mastadon didn't play, so that
bumped everything else up by about twenty-five minutes. Got some free swag: a
lanyard (key thing) from 102.9 the Buzz radio station, a mint-flavoured Trojan
condom (for that mint tingle!), a pack of Criss Angel Midfreak Mints (I won't
eat them, they're cinnamon), a beer-bottle keychain from the movie Waiting -
holy shit, it's got a bottle opener on it!, an OzzFest 2005 summer sampler cd,
from the PS place - thekamisama
and I played some racing game, he played with the EyeToy, and I played with the
PSP, we both got demo disks, mine is for God of War - the Hydra Battle, and his
is for Jak and Daxter Trilogy, and as I'm looking at it, I see that it's a
movie. For purchased swag, we both got a tapestry each (yeah, some hippies were
there), thekamisama got the one I really liked, it's the outlines of a tribal-tattooed face, but
they only had one. So, I let him have that one, and I got a black and white one
with a butterfly on it. It was either that, or something with a pot leaf on it.
And I got a parasol, which ended up being my favourite purchase (aside from the
food/alcohol) because it kept the sun off. Speaking of pot, right before Rob
Zombie went on, the people standing to the left in front of us (in the crowd)
were selling dope. It would have been funnier if the guy's girlfriend was
inhaling, but (coming from a VETERAN pot-smoker) she wasn't. Then she bragged
about "OH MY GOD I AM SOOOOOOOOOOO HIGH!". I just had to laugh. Elbowed a dude
in the face after he shoved me, and he ended up buying thekamisama
a beer or three and me some stuff from the Jack Daniel's booth (since I don't do
the beer-drinking). He said, "Wow, I've never had a girl hit me that hard
before." as he wiped blood off his face. Had to go sit down after a bit, got a
little hot and needed to rest. Right before I got the guy in the face, thekamisama
pushed a dude by his face. Stuck his hand right on it and shoved. We weren't
bothered by the mosh pits again. During Killswitch Engage, we were around the
middle of the crowd, but by the time Rob Zombie came on, we were very close to
the stage. People were blowing up mint-flavoured Trojans and bopping them around
like they were beach balls. Albeit mint-flavoured ones.
I liked the fact
that there were so many people dressed badly, I wanted to take pictures of them
and post a "What Definitely not to wear, because Hal will make fun of you"
section, but there wasn't enough film in the camera (I did get a picture with a
guy who was dressed in a Red Riding Hood costume.). It looked like a Hot Topic
exploded on so many people out there. One guy was walking around with a
ground-length vinyl jacket with buckles and straps, we saw him about ten minutes
later with it slung over his shoulder. Lame. There were the Excellent
versions of bikini tops and spaghetti-strap tops, then there were the
horrible ones, where lots of fat jiggled freely. I'm a big girl, but I
was covered up. There's no amount of money that will get me to jiggle in public
all funky-like. These were fat girls in ultra-skinny girl clothes. Like bikini
tops and daisy dukes, with acres of skin showing. And before I get all those
comments about "If they're comfortable with themselves" - blah blah. I don't
want to hear it. I feel that it is tacky, and I wouldn't want my
girlfriend/wife/whatever wandering around looking bad. Especially if they've got
stretchmarks that look like a roadmap of Tokyo.
After we left
OzzFest, thekamisama said, "Let's go to a bar." I was already pretty lit, a combiination of a lot of
sun, a lot of alcohol and very little food made me give not a fuck about the
situation. So, we went to Mulligan's, and drank for a few more hours. Made it
home, then I passed right the hell out. I think I'm going to go take a
Oh yeah, Rob Zombie fucking RULES.

First off, I got the Japanese Mask tapestry.. not the tribal guy. I think they were sold out of those..

And that guy deserved to be shoved by the face. He pushed me. I pushed him back. He talked smack after he passed me and turned around so I cussed him like the bitch he is. He stepped up and got shoved into the mud. Maybe he should've asked the mosh pit and hardcore dance freako's what happened to them when they ran into me. I'd just shove them back across the length of the pit.

Rob did rock. no fucking doubt.. he is one of my faves. So I might be biased. I was dissapointed in the crowd for not knowing when to sing along (they were recording a live album at the time) , not even knowing the words to Demonoid Phenomenon, and then going totally lost any and all Nashville southern rock cred for not being able to figure out that they were supposed to be singing along to the Devil's Rejects/ Lynyrd Skynyrd cover closing song.

Who else was good? hmmmm I am picky so...
Trivium did a good set, they were the first people we saw.
Black Dahlia Murder was ... overrated! I still think they ride on the shock factor of the obscure name, not any talent they have
Missed a couple of people like Jada Pinkett Smith's (you know the Fresh Prince's wife) band. No great losses.. the bullshitting and drinking was worth it.
Soilwork did a solid set
I was too drunk to pay attetion to if A dozen Furies actually played..
Mastadon was MIA, so what? who cares?
As I lay Dying was something.. something I had no opinion of
Killswitch Engage really fucking impressed me. I had not really ever been a fan of them before. But they motivate the crowd and made a really fuckin bad ass show.
Rob zombie.. like I havent said enough?? Love that old school Batman and Robin shirt!

On the Main stage.. I fell asleep, or wanted to...

Shadows Fall is loud, thats about it.
Mudvanye sucks. nuff said
Velvet Revolver did actually rock the house. I don't consider them really "metal" more like hard rock or something. But they did a damn good job for a bunch of 12 step recoveries.. which reminds me of..
Ozzy and Sabbath. He is not looking good. not at all.. but he can still put on that game face. I am glad Ozzy has decided to hang it up before this become really embarrassing.

Oh if I didn't mention a band. thats cause they sucked or I was getting beer. If I mentioned you sucked (like Mudvayne) then you sucked really fucking bad...

oh yeah one last thing, the guy on the crutches with the messed up legs.. that was the most rocking guy there. If you have major problems with a handicap.. and you still come out to something this big, you got a fucking dark dedicated metalhead soul brother!

Hand me some more lotion, I think my skin is melting

just got home little more then an hour ago

instead of going to sleep, after being up for excesses of 24 hours, mainly thanks to OZZFEST decending on Nashville..
I have been looking for what little info I can on the fate of my main man Gobo and his home across the lake from New Orleans, Louisiana.

The latestest news from his area looks somewhat promising that he is okay. The news coming out of the proper city of New Orelans however, is an absolute fuckin fright.

I recall thinking how much "bullshit" it was when DC did that whole Batman crossover where a natural disaster forced the government to close Gotham City off from the rest of America.
There are reports on some poarts of the internet that some of the worst looting is
Now with recent events in New Orleans, and announcements that the city may be closed for up to 2-3 months, this bit of science fiction seems all too frighteningly real.

Yo Dogman, I wish you the best defending your corner of the Earth.

More on Ozzfest later when I wake up.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Last night was the first time I had done any quantifiable drinking of alchohol in months. I still have a slight ringing in my head.
It was good to take a practical two day Bloggin break. Some days I hate writing something everyday. It's a given to the fact that I am not a writer, and largely do this as a personal journal and self entertaining art project of sorts. Not to mention the wonderful oppertunities to stalk live prey on the open savannah's of virtual cyberspace here in the blogosphere.

So this happened Friday.
I am at the local Wal-Mart, and this guy just comes up to me going "Hey guy Hey" which usually pisses the fuck out of me. I made it a point to not turn around for quite a while and hoped that he got the clue.
Well I got tired of playing dumb and figured maybe it was something important.
Guy says "Do you sell comics man?"
Me replies,"No"
Guy retorts "Oh I must got you confused with someone else"
Me states, "I used to run a comic shop in Hoptown years ago"

The conversation ends up going into him not being able to find Conan comics. The guy lives in Kentucky so I direct him to Kevin at Fantasy Limited in Madisonville, and tell him he might be able to find the old magazine ones at the two Great Escape stores in Nashville. I also school him to the more literate book influenced series' that Dark Horse is coming out with right now. I have peeked at best at the new books, but I appreciate trying to remain true to Howard's character in opposition to the steroid genetic freak version that Marvel did for decades. It is hard to play dueling banjos with interpretation of one dimensional characters however. I guess it comes down to taste.

To me, the best version of Conan in comics is not really Conan, it is Marv in Sin City....

It is still nice to see that I still have the "Comic Dude" aura though.

They have been doing a series of 75th anniversary comic strips in Blondie this week. Comic strips have never been much of my tastes and I groan more at the whitewashed G rated stale humour most of them deal with. (The exceptions are For Better or For Worse, Get Fuzzy, Opus, Non Sequitor, and the actual political stuff in Doonsberry)
But with the new injection of characters crossing over from other comic strips into Blondie, and the self parody of "comics in general" going into the normally lame family sitcom style strip has made Blondie actually FUNNY for the first time in years!
Too bad this wil all go away at the end of next week.

Well I better head out and stalk the rest of the journals.. I just have to see Gobo laughing at the hurricane.

Thursday, August 25, 2005




bye bye.

Monday, August 22, 2005

I feel like being offensive

You shouldn't even look. Cause I am trying to be offensive, I fucking swear, you have been warned.

You will get fired for looking at this link at work okay? If you do, tough shit... go eat a cock.

livejournal cut tags dont work on blogger so go see the original at

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

your new internet buzzword, presented by FORD and thekamisama

This week's new internet buzzword is

"White trashploitation"

Please attempt to use this buzzword in a sentance below and then feel free to repeat as often as needed for internet coolness and workplace confusion!

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

We have detected a virus in this post, would you like to delete?

The most un-news news story has been breaking all over and only on CNN. OH MY GOD! THEY GOT A VIRUS!

Of course when CNN gets a fucking old ass virus they never patched Windows up for, it is news...
I keep turning it to the FAUX NEWS and MSNBC, just to see if the ticker will say "CNN Crippled by lack of security in antivirus software and not updating windows."

This is too fucking funny. It is only news on one place on earht right now, yet they are making it out to be a global emergency.
Microsoft and many Internet security firms still say this is a "low impact" virus.

A fly on the elephants ass, but they are reporting it like we just went to war with Canada or something.

This is why you can't trust the news kids.

Monday, August 15, 2005

So long and thanks for all the fish!

Real news item by the BBC, reported today.
Dolphin spectacle baffles experts

A group of up to 2,000 common dolphins has been spotted off the
coast of west Wales.

Marine experts said it was "massively unusual" to see so many off the
Pembrokeshire coast, and the reason remained a mystery.

Cliff Benson, who runs Sea Trust, the marine branch of the Wildlife Trust of
South and West Wales, said it had been an incredible sight.

"It's fairly normal to see a hundred or so, but not thousands."

Mr Benson, who carries out regular survey work on cetaceans - dolphins,
whales, and porpoises - was on his boat when he saw the dolphins approaching.

"It was like a volcanic eruption," he said. "There were dolphins of all ages
- adults and mothers with their babies - and they were leaping out of the water.

"It's a mystery as to why there were so many. It could be because the waters
are so rich in food, and that there aren't many predators.

"They could be coming here specifically to breed because the conditions are
so right."

Mr Benson, who lives in Llanwnda, near Fishguard, is keen to get the
Pembrokeshire coast marketed to tourists who enjoy seeing marine life.

"People think they have to go to Florida to see dolphins leaping out of the
water, but it's all right here," he said.

"We should be marketing this area as 'The Dolphin Coast', and encouraging
tourists to come here and spend their money to boost the local economy.

"There's a small coastal village in Ireland that has a particularly friendly
dolphin, and people travel hundreds of miles to see him. He's worth £5m a year
to that village."

Either something big is going to happen in Wales, or the whole Earth.. this might beone of the pickup points...

Anywhoo's I am grabbing my towel and hitting the sub-etha wave bands for a pickup off this rock, just in case...

If I drop off the face of the blogosphere, well you won't have long to worry anyways, will you?

klaproth_1Klaproth was right when he predicted the UFO's would come to take me away one day. Adios Guys! It's been a blast.. oh bad choice of words...

Sunday, August 14, 2005

gotta love the big girls

fat bottom girls you make the rockin world go round...
a gay man said that
so that is saying alot if even he could get a chub from a big girl

Little Green Men and Bug Eyed Monsters

Back in my hometown, they are finally having a celebration for the 1955 "Little Green Men" incident up the road in Kelly. Years ago when I had my comic shop, I used to be utterly bewildered by the fact that local residents were more embarrassed by this and being the home to Edgar Cayce. When most small towns will pimp out any connection to an event, no matter how weird, to attract tourists and hotels, this attitude seemed rather backwards.
I sold hundreds of X-Files comics that referenced the event as a fictional story with Mulder and Scully. So I knew there was already a local market and interest for the story, perhaps enough to start a small street festival. Instead they are going with a convention style event, kudos either way, it is about time.
If this thing is successful, I will have to say "I told you so".
The funny thing is, I have a sort of connection to this, I think I have mentioned it breifly before back last year. But my grandfather debunked this story years ago. His eyewitness report has been virtually ignored for years because it contradicts the traditional story and UFOlogists don't like to report much of..
especially when that truth doesn't help them sell books about proof that UFO's exist.

I think it was just the fucking cats. Silver, glowing eyes, jumps incredibly at shotgun blasts, big ears and eyes.. it is laughable how simple it was. It is sad how much has been made of a whole lot of nothing.
But I am glad the people in Hoptown finally figured out a way to make a buck on it. Now where is the Edgar Cayce Festival?

Saturday, August 13, 2005


Me and Captain Spaulding.. you bitches!

Where do handicap people go to fuck in the back seat of the car?

that is all...